Twists & Turns

Recently my life has truly been a rollercoaster. I mean most sane people would be hanging on for dear life at this point, but I know that all I can do is continue to pray for endurance and do my part. God has really been showing me that he is in control of everything in my life, from me losing my job, things happening in my personal life, to getting into grad school. Whether positive or negative everything is all in His hands. Our job is to prepare and endure the storm. Whatever the situation is there is always a lesson to be learned, and that lesson may not always come quickly. Sometimes those lessons are hard and uncomfortable for us, but that's what makes us remember when our egos get big again and think we are in control! He knows the way and he knows what's best. My best advice for anyone going thru these twists and turns is to pray for discernment and revelation. Pray to be able to discern the good form bad in your life, God gives us free will and he wants to take care of us but we have to follow his ways and his path in order to receive those blessings. Pray for revelation if you are unsure or uncertain about something, he will show you! But I always say and have to remind myself that you have to be ready to see it. If you are not ready to see what He is showing you then it won't benefit you, believe what He is showing you and don’t second guess it. I recently created a vision board with all of my goals and photos of accomplishments that I want to achieve on it. In the middle I wrote, "God" because I want to keep him at the center of my life. Under that I made a daily affirmation for myself, I wrote: "I am_______" every day I change what I want to be that day (you are what you think). So some days I put; I am worthy, etc. It helps me keep my inner thoughts and goals in front of me. I say all this to say that life is full of twists and turns some will be bad and others wonderful. We can’t choose those things. What we can choose is how we deal with them and who/what we turn to in those times. Stay blessed. 

"Some people feel the rain, others get wet." - Anais Nin

Shame On Us! - Gabrielle Douglas

As many little girls jumped up and down and screamed with glee on August 2, 2012 at the sight of Gabby Douglas, many grown women took to Facebook and Twitter to complain about Gabby Douglas’s hair. I am almost ashamed to say that the majority of the women that I personally saw criticizing Douglas’s tresses were fellow black women.  If you are/were one of them, shame on you.

Gabrielle Douglas for anyone who does not know is now the 2012 individual all-around gold medal Olympic champion!!! This young lady is amazing!!! She is the definition of an inspiration, I am 25 years old and I can say that I look up to Gabby. That night which should have been a unifying and proud moment for most African-Americans, instead quickly turned into a “black hair” discussion. Now I am not sure if I am more upset that these were other black women or that this topic is still an issue.

Let me address the people (especially the sistas) who criticized Douglas’s hair. First of all, these are the Olympics, not the Miss. America pageant! This is a sporting event where young men and women are judged on their athletic ability, not their wardrobe (in this case) or their makeup, and certainly not their hair! Gabby Douglas went out there in that Olympic arena and gave the performance of her life. She was sweating, her heart was pounding, and she was thriving!! To say the least her hair got “messed up”. Why is that such a big deal in our community!?  As a woman, yet alone a black woman, you should understand this point (and if not maybe you should consider doing some sort of physical exercise yourself). This girl is 16 years old; she was concerned with her performance not what type of hair do she was sporting. I find it so disheartening that other black women and girls could be so cruel especially since most of us have had a bad experience with this topic.

Secondly, the fact that this whole “good” hair “bad” hair topic is still an issue really makes me nuts! I get it, to have more European features (including) hair is usually considered “good”, but how long are we going to hold onto that? It’s time to move on and let it go. I’m sure most would say what do I know, and honestly I know a lot. Growing up I was too black for the whites and too white for the blacks, I am not complaining just stating that for the record I understand the torment of not fitting in. My people and others, we have to let this issue go. All of our hair is different, our skin is different, our eyes and the list goes on.

Please let Ms. Douglas delight in this moment and be proud of her accomplishments as the first African-American in Olympic history to become the individual all-around champion, as well as the first American gymnast to win gold in both the individual all-around and team competitions at the same Olympics. Hair is the least of our issues; please let’s start acting like it.

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Feeling A Tad Bit Magenta?!

Magenta... that's what I like to call the feeling that most of us all know but can’t quite describe (all of my 80's TV watchers will catch the reference). I tweeted about this exact thing today. The magenta feeling is when you're not quite blue (sad) or green with envy; you're not red with anger, or yellow with fear. You are just magenta, it’s that ho-hum feeling that's hard to describe to anyone who hasn’t felt it before.

The magenta effect usually happens either when something is going wrong in your life or exactly the opposite when nothing is going on in your life. I recently have experienced this feeling a lot. I work my job, I spend time with my boyfriend, exercise, and do my normal day-to-day stuff, but something is missing. As I have been hearing about good news from friends and acquaintances, I wouldn’t exactly say that I have been green with envy, but I definitely haven’t been my usual extra exuberant self. My point in saying all of this isn’t to bore everyone with my life story, but I think that it’s important to talk about our feelings with our friends so that we can all deal with our issues better and in a healthy way.

Usually my magenta feeling doesn’t last long, after a good bubble bath and a glass of wine the world is renewed and all is well! On the other hand I have been feeling magenta more often than normal. In my own case I think a lot of it has to do with not living up to my full potential. I know that I have so much to offer yet I feel stifled and bored. This fact has pushed me into trying some new things; for starters this blog is one of them. I’ve always loved talking to others and sharing my opinion and I’ve always been a decent writer, so I thought why not join those two things to create my very own blog. Also, I’ve finally made the concrete decision to go back to school for my masters in counseling. I’ve decided not to sit and feel sorry for myself and actually do something about this dreadful feeling. To some these things may not seem like that big of a deal, and in all actuality they aren’t. In my opinion it’s not always the big steps that we take, instead it’s the small steps that we take daily that make a true change in our lives.

So please let me know if you’ve ever felt “magenta”, and if so how do you deal with it? I can’t wait to hear from you!!

Youth gone mad!

First off let me say how saddened my heart was after reading this story and watching the accompanying video. I have my own beliefs as to why the youth in our country have appeared to go insane, but for now I digress. I learned of this horrific event from an old co-worker of mine, we like to keep in touch and talk about the news of the ongoing day. So she sent me a link entitled, "O Lord help us all". Of course my mind began to ponder what could possibly be so horrible. So I opened the link and to my shock I read the headline; "9-Year-Old Caught on Tape Violently Kicking, Punching, Biting Babies At Daycare". I was almost too afraid to read the article but I continued. 

To recap the story for those who have not heard about it, a nine year Mississippi boy punched, kicked, bit, and tormented babies and small children at a day care while the staff talked on the phone and amongst one another. The entire act was caught on surveillance cameras and to my surprise the 9 year old boy at this time will not be arrested. That is correct, you read that last sentence right. The child will not be arrested; however authorities are considering mandatory anger management and counseling. Now to make matters even more complicated, a father of one of the injured children has been arrested for a misdemeanor assault. The father came to the day care after being notified of the crime, and he wanted answers. He asked the 9 year old who hurt his child and the boy told the father that it was another 6 year old child. The clearly angered father slapped the 6 year old who he thought was the culprit.  

Okay let me take this one step at a time; first of all I truly blame the parents of the 9 year old abuser. After being asked about his family life, his mother stated that there is no abuse in her home and that she doesn't understand why he would hit anyone. An aunt of the child says that he does have "problems" and is on medication, but that he is a "normal" child. Hmm... really? Normal children do not hit, donkey kick, and bite other children, as the video shows this was not kiddie play or in good fun. This young man was trying to hurt those other children and he intentionally watched out for the day care workers to insure that he wouldn’t be caught. This is no light matter, he is extremely lucky that other parents didn't come in and do more to him for the horror he put their children through. His mother should be ashamed, that is all that she has to say about what her son did?! I am honestly afraid for his mother because in a few years her son will be a grown man and could possibly hurt her, her other children and God knows who else!! Have mercy on that home. 

Next off, let’s address the workers of the day care!! Being that their job is to supervise and aide the children of the daycare, it’s obvious to say that they dropped the ball. I am ashamed that these are black women who are shown in this footage. The staff was supposed to be taking care of these parent's children, not blabbing on the phone and ignoring the apparent screams and cries for help. 

Thank the Lord that all of the children are okay and did not sustain irrevocable damage from this child's reign of horror. Hopefully some good will come out of this situation, if anything I hope and pray that daycare workers and owners will take heed and really pick up the ball and begin to really supervise and care for the children that they are paid and trusted to watch. Also I hope parents will look for warning signs of dangerous and harmful behavior of their children. The violence is getting out of hand, this boy is only nine years old and already he is full of rage and anger. Let’s pray and do our best to insure that more children do not go down this path of destruction. 

Source: http://mybrownbaby.com/